On the first of July, I banned cucumbers from all Feline Fine Dining kitchens. It was not an easy decision. It was the right one. Anyone who has watched a cat encounter a cucumber on the floor knows the horror, the leap and the dreadful loss of dignity.
I made the announcement at a staff meeting. A line cook named Pierre protested, saying the cucumber is the pride of the salad. I put him in charge of the walk in freezer for a week. Since then we have had zero cucumber related incidents, no airborne cats and a 22 percent improvement in morale. Salads have lost some crunch, but our dignity has returned.
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